I am home to do a quick change between the funeral service for my friend Pepper and my birthday dinner (in anticipation of Monday’s actual birthday). During the homily, the reverend talked about my friend’s sense of wonder, his gift for connection, the way deep loving relationships reveal to us our many different layers. And so I am heading back into the deep dark cold to perhaps cry a little, to definitely drink and eat a little in a restaurant where the waiters sometimes give me hugs and the owner asks about my Italian lessons and where wait several friends who make me a better version of myself each time we meet.